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6. Supporting Women with Children
Supporting parents of young children is important, especially in a time when paid employment has taken center stage. Parents’ work as nurturers greatly influences their children’s emotional health, and society at large, though their efforts too often remain invisible to the larger world.
Since the role of a fulltime caregiver can be consuming, caregivers frequently defer their own needs and interests in lieu of their child’s. While, as a society, we want to encourage parents to do the very best job that they can, in the long run, both caregivers and their children are better off when they have regular breaks from each other. Caregivers are generally happier and healthier when they maintain friendships outside of the family circle and continue to pursue hobbies and other activities that they enjoy. A regular break from child-raising responsibilities can provide time for a parent to create a more balanced lifestyle. A Parents’ Morning Out (PMO) group can also serve another purpose: It can help adults in the church, who are at the same stage in life and experiencing similar life challenges, to get to know each other.
The First Universalist Church of Minneapolis began offering a weekly Mothers’ Morning Out group in 1996. The group soon included men and the name was changed to Parents’ Morning Out. The PMO is run like a cooperative, with the church providing free space for the group. Parent members take turns at providing childcare and snacks. Most of the parents involved in the group are stay-home parents but a few have outside, paid employment and use their “free morning” to work. The at-home parents frequently use their “free” morning to run household errands; most find they can run at least twice as many errands without their children in tow.
According to Samantha Loesch, the coordinator of PMO in 2000, optimal enrollment is six to eight families. The PMO group does not adjust responsibilities according to the number of children in the family though no family presently enrolled has more than two children participating at one time. The PMO collects names on a waiting list in the fall since some attrition usually occurs during the first few weeks that the program is in session.
Two parents always remain at the church to provide childcare and the program is held on Wednesday of each week. The parents use one of the rooms designed for toddlers and preschoolers and are welcome to use the church’s toys. Those who are caregiving/teaching on a given morning are encouraged to bring a special activity to share. However, the program is very informal and maintains a focus on play. The adult caregivers serve as substitute parent figures more than as teachers, and they strive to help all children feel secure and happy while learning through play. To keep all families optimally healthy, parents and children who are ill are encouraged to remain at home; other parents in the program readily step in at a moment’s notice when someone is sick. All participating families are asked to sign a disclaimer that holds the church harmless should any child(ren) become injured or ill while at the church.
See Appendix I for forms used by First Universalist’s Parents’ Morning Out Group.