Revitalizing UU Women's Groups

Appendix C: 1. Tips on Hosting a Mother Daughter Banquet

From First Universalist Church, Minneapolis, Minnesota

Timing

Spring is a good time for the banquet. Avoid scheduling it near Easter and spring breaks. Try the Friday evening before Mother’s Day and encourage members to bring their mothers and their daughters-also aunts, friends, mentors, mentees. Reserve the social hall before setting the date and advertising.

Theme

Magic of Daughters theme was great-a big hit with the kids; “historic women” theme has also been popular, especially with older girls. Youthful jugglers were great entertainment one year.

Budget

Organizer needs a budget ahead of time. Ticket prices have covered the food only, not entertainment, desserts, beverages, name tags, napkins, decorations, etc.

Consider two ticket prices:
- A “worker” ($8/$5) if you help by bringing a dessert, cleaning up, setting up, etc.; or
- A “guest” rate($15/$10) if you don’t help in a significant way.
Keep prices low for those who wouldn’t be able to come otherwise but fair for those who make special efforts to help out. The different rates build in a “no guilt” attitude; if you can’t help, it’s no problem but the extra resources help to hire help if needed.
Having a raffle is popular; try a specialty bakery gift certificate; you might seek donations from local bakeries. Advertise the raffle ahead of time so that people bring some cash along.

Advertising

The earlier the better. Consider a mailing to all church women/girls. Flyers can be stuffed in church bulletins or handed out after the church services one Sunday.
Ask permission to make fun, theatrical pulpit announcements at the services one Sunday.
Make sure there is a notice in the Order of Service each Sunday that tickets are sold.
Run an ad about the banquet in three-four issues of the church newsletter with address to order tickets by mail (ask respondents to send a self addressed, stamped envelope).

Special Interest Tables

Consider featuring some of the following special interest tables at the banquet (guests would have to specify interest when buying tickets to plan for and label tables):

Table for mothers of sons (be direct about encouraging them to come)
Table for mothers with teens
Table for grandmothers
Table for those whose mother is not able to come to the banquet
Potluck: any interest (meet someone new!)
Intergenerational table (get to know women of other ages
Other interest tables could include: gardening, travel, politics, social justice, dance, music, theater, education, etc.

Tickets

Must set prices before you can make the tickets. Make tickets before the first day of ticket sales. Arrange for volunteers to staff a ticket sales table in the social hall after services for three-four weeks prior to the banquet. Keep mother/daughter pairs together on the list of tickets sold. Note ages of daughters under twenty.

Set Up

Four or more persons are needed by 4:30 p.m. on the day of the event to set up tables and chairs according to the registrations and allowing space for the entertainment. Make sure someone has keys to the building and to the kitchen cupboards (tablecloths, china, flatware).

Decorations

To keep costs down, use existing supplies whenever possible. Sell centerpieces to recover some costs or use as door prizes.

Printed Program

Is one really needed? If so, make sure someone is assigned to this job. If writings are included, copyright laws must be heeded. For artwork, ask girls to submit their work; consider collaborating with the R.E. department. Consider using the program as part of the ice breaking activity. Provide crayons so guests can color them, marking their places.

Ice Breaker

Plan some special activity to help everyone feel more comfortable. If “Notable Women” theme is used, pin the name of a historical figure on each woman’s back. Everyone mills about asking questions about their character without asking directly who she is. The goal is to guess the name pinned on your own back.

Opening/Singing/Blessing

Need someone to open the program, make a short speech and let everyone know what to expect. Assign someone (minister preferred) to give readings. Assign someone to lead a song or two. Assign someone to give the blessing or lead a responsive reading.

Food

Everyone likes fruit, salad, and bread. Generally speaking, you need less of the main course dish than you might think (if you’re expecting 85 persons, order or make entrée for 70–75) Girls love macaroni and cheese!

Other Food/Details

Leftover food is no problem as planners can take it home. Buy beverages at least one day before the event and refrigerate them well. Buy half and half for coffee drinkers. Make sure someone is assigned to start the coffee early enough. Provide water pitchers, with ice and lemon slices, on all tables. Don’t forget napkins. The dishwasher should be turned on before the program begins so that the water is hot when it’s time to do dishes.

Entertainment

Magician is great for girls of all ages. If you’re using a historical theme, theatrical monologues are good, but tend to appeal to older girls. Consider your entertainment when specifying the ages of girls who may attend.